House of the Gods

Session 1: Five Met In Fourmont
The Beginnening

Everyone meets in Fourmont. Gavique tells us to seek out Setheril near the Fort of the Wilderking. The way to the Fort of the Wilderking is difficult to navigate, so she recommends that we make our way to Littlebrook, and there engage the services of Ellicott who can guide us the rest of the way.

On the way to Littlebrook we rescue a mother and son from goblins who had ambushed their wagon. We escort them back to LIttlebrook.

Upon arriving in Littlebrook, we learn that more goblins are harassing the outlying farms, and that Ellicott has gone scouting to look for their base of operations. Edmund finesses the lock at Ellicott’s cabin, and therein we find a sketched map of the nearby area that indicate three possible locations that could house goblin marauders.

At the first location, Edmund and Finzuleimyn are nearly devoured by giant spiders in a cave. The only goblins there were dried husks.

The second location held a sleeping owlbear, also in a cave, who we let off easy this time, because we were feeling generous.

The third location proved to be the cave we wanted. Always the last place you look, they say. We made several attempts to infiltrate the cave, with varying degrees of success, but between worgs, goblin ambushers, and tidal flume traps, our team put the “T” in sTraTegic reTreaT.

While we tended to our wounds in the night a mile or so away from the cave, the howls of a goblin/worg warband were heard moving toward Littlebrook. Not long after, flames and smoke could be seen rising from the town.

Torn between a sense that we must be responsible for the attack on the town and the pragmatism that we could not make it back in time to help in any meaningful way with Finzuleimyn as wounded as he was, we decided to take another crack at the goblin cave the next day.

I think this is where we stopped the first session, but I may be misremembering. – Scott

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Session 2: The Cave of Goblinoid Usurpation
The Enemy of My Enemy is My Independent Contractor

(as told by Yeemik, extra supreme leader of all goblins and super trustworthy paladin)

Yeemik thinks adventurers very useful! Stupid, but useful!

Bunch of stupid adventurers come leaping all angry-like into goblin den on poker night (and Yeemik leading in poking, too!), complaining about fellow super-intelligent goblins trying to drown stupid adventurers with dam releases flooding tunnel (ha ha—Yeemik wishes could have seen looks on faces when adventurers all washed out!). Too bad river not wash them very far—but soaking wet adventurers still funny to laugh at.

Anyway, stupid adventurers start smashing goblins, saying stupid adventurer things, but then very brave and very smart Yeemik threaten to kill Klarg’s prized prisoner, stupid goblin-sticking hunter from village Klarg keeps yapping about burning. Adventurers bow in awe to Yeemik’s power and agree to get rid of stupid Klarg for Yeemik. Stupid Klarg was always like, “Stupid goblins obey me blah blah blah!”. Stupid, stupid Klarg. Yeemik hate obeying! Yeemik better suited for giving orders!

Well, Yeemik think adventurers look likely to finish Klarg given lesser goblins already smooshed into pasty mess. And stupid adventurers agree Yeemik very trustworthy holder of prisoner they looking for after Yeemik convince them he paladin just like them. Stupid adventurers so stupid! Ha!

So adventurers run off to find missing companion (who turns out almost eaten by Neerf and Hogl after she chase stinky Pthar from bridge)(stinky Pthar such idiot—should have farted in adventurer’s direction! Then Pthar could at least have had snack before other adventurers find him!)(Oh well, less goblins means more treasure for all-powerful Yeemik!).

After stupid adventurers find near-dead companion, they grow stupider and run off to wolf den to hide like stupid scaredy-tail kobolds, risking Yeemik’s life if Klarg smart enough to figure out Yeemik’s plan. Luckily, Klarg not smart like Yeemik.

But stupid adventurers still stupid! What point of tricking adventurers to kill Klarg if adventurers just run off to sleep? Is no nap time in Yeemik’s plan! Very annoying! Lazy adventurers not deserve gift of Yeemik!

Well, Yeemik help anyway, but only because stupid Klarg more annoying than adventurers. Yeemik tell Klarg adventurers run off to hills—all part of master plan so Klarg not suspect death just below! Is very tricky, Yeemik. Is smart! Then stupid adventurers finally remember plan and sneak into Klarg’s room to make much smashing of Klarg. Hooray for Klarg death! Goblins cheer from hidey holes!

Unfortunately, stupid adventurers also find Klarg’s treasure, stash which should be Yeemik’s as new supreme goblin leader. Yet another reason Yeemik hate stupid adventurers…even if sometimes useful.

Well, because Yeemik not want prisoner, he hand prisoner to adventurers, but only after making adventurers bow and scrape before Yeemik and promise never trouble goblins again. Ha! Adventurers know powerful goblin when they see! Then stupid adventurers leave to go look at farm goblins burn down other night, blah blah blah, adventurer stuff. Who cares. Just stupid adventurers doing stupid adventurer stuff.

Yeemik adventures just begun, though. Am leading goblins east where stupid bone lady with stupid bone lady hat cannot find. No smart goblin want to see bone lady when she come poking about to see why Klarg no doing what she asked. Bone lady stupid scary, and even all-powerful Yeemik know better than to mess with her.

..although, if Yeemik ever find where bone lady sleeping, maybe trick new adventurers into smashing flat! So easy to trick! But this time, Yeemik get all treasure and be richest supreme goblin leader ever!

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Session 3: Greenburrow Ossuary
Dead Family and their Dirty Grounds

We explored the still smoking remains of the Greenburrow farm house, within which we fought the reanimated, smoke-belching corpses of the parents, daughter, and twins.

Within a chest in the in the master bedroom we found an old, tarnished holy symbol that seems to be from some sort of sect of a cult devoted to the Serpentine Unending. It seemed to match a tattoo found on pappa greenburrow.

In the nearly collapsed basement we found a secret door that lead us southward through a tunnel. The first stop of the tunnel had us encounter a vicious little dust mephit in his library. It would seem that the mephit had something to do with raising the family as undead since they seemed to have extra dusty powers above and beyond regular zombitudinosity.

Found quite the book collection there, along with a wand of detect magic with 3 charges.

Continued on to find a charnel pit underground with a trapdoor over it. Used the wand to detect magic, and after debasing ourselves in that hellish goo pit, discovered what turned out to be a gem of elemental summoning. Without this we would later be TOAST.

Within the Ossuary, we found a bone gate that could be opened with Darvella’s freely offered blood. Beyond that door we fought a spectre and a bunch of clacking skull minions. Note to self: don’t let a spectre touch your private places. Edmund cracked open the gem and summoned Airy Potter the air elemental, who turned out to be nigh indestructible.

In the final room we found a lot of angry skeletons and whatnot guarding a box made of finger bones. When Edmund had Airy lay waste to the skeletons and then fetch him the box, the box did 1 point of necrotic damage, Edmund failed his concentration roll, and we all almost had to roll up new characters as Airy turned on his former masters. Fortunately G’tag talked the fiend from another plane down and we made it out in one piece.

On the way out we started an oily fire in the charnel/trapdoor room so that we could find that spot topside.

And that’s about where we called it. We intend to see if the remaining son has a similar tattoo of evil, and ask him what he knows. And also consider what to do with the fingerbox.

The books collected from the Ossuary library are cataloged here.

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